So, I’m no blogging genius. When I first started blogging I had zero idea of the etiquette, cultish followings, or blogging cliques that existed. I pretty much started this as a procrastination tool. I’m still half-assed and hardly an expert; I have been dragging my feet even getting my self-hosted site up and running (does that even make sense?) because I have almost zero clue where to start (but dammit, I will learn, eventually. I will). But even with all that, I am starting to get some idea of what the blogging world is all about.
There are some phrases non-bloggers may or may not realize are not a good idea to say to someone who blogs:
1. I read your blog. With no follow-up. Oh. Thank you? You read it. But you didn’t say what it was exactly that you read. Or if you liked it. Or hated it. Or if it made sense. Or if you connected with it at all. Are you trying to tell me you are doing me a favor by reading it? Was it a chore? Did the post pique your interest and then disappoint? Know that most bloggers are incredibly insecure, and also inept when it comes to verbal communication, so if you said this to us, we probably just nodded and ran away, thinking that whatever it was that you read was ridiculous, boring, and/or full of grammatical errors and typos.
2. How’s your blog? Um. I don’t know. How IS it? That isn’t really something a blogger can answer for you. We like what we write…that’s why we write it. But how do you measure how a blog is doing? Are you asking if we still enjoy doing it? Or how many people read it? Or if we’ve made millions in advertising revenue? No matter what the question, it’s clear that you aren’t interested enough to have any input about how the blog “is”. At least that’s what our insecure brain is telling us you think.
3. Does anyone read your blog? Um, come on. ANYONE? You know at least my mom reads it. And sometimes she forces her friends to. So, um YEAH. THEY DO. Humph.
4. Are you still doing your blog? Seriously? If you really care, you’d just click the website and find out. And if you don’t care, that’s fine, really. We know that what we write might not be your style, or might not be interesting to you and that’s okay. But, your question belies your feigned interest. Please don’t pretend like you care all of a sudden just because I ran into you at Starbucks.
5. Nothing. This means you either didn’t read it or you read it and didn’t like it. Did I mention that bloggers tend to be sensitive and unsure? We are emotional scardey-cats. Hiss! We can tell how many people read our posts, but we can’t tell who, unless you comment. However we do realize that it just isn’t everyone’s “thing” to comment on blog posts (we’re guilty of this too, sometimes you’re just too busy or don’t feel like you have anything of value to say) so this form of communication is much preferred to 1, 2, 3 or 4. It’s the lesser of all the evils. Meow.