Thank Goodness The Next Christmas Isn’t Until Next Year

As an adult, Christmas has been my least favorite holiday.  For starters, I’m not so into the whole religious aspect.  Or the wasteful over-spending on gifts no one really needs.  And it’s almost not even worth mentioning the over-booking, the last-minute changes of plans, the cooking, cleaning and never-ending dish washing. I do love spending time with family, under normal circumstances, so I’ve tried VERY … Continue reading Thank Goodness The Next Christmas Isn’t Until Next Year

Depression is Analogous to Treading Water

Depression is hard to explain to those who haven’t experienced it firsthand. People who are lucky enough to not understand it often brush it off, and expect the depressed to just, “snap out of it”.  There’s no limp, no rash, no wheezy cough.  It’s an invisible ailment.  The disease is misunderstood and has a negative stigma and it can be embarrassing to admit you have mental health condition. … Continue reading Depression is Analogous to Treading Water

Underwater Soap Opera

Mr. Grouch has decided to pick up a few hobbies recently. One of these hobbies is maintaining a freshwater fish tank.  This tank has been chock full of drama from the beginning – a replacement for any soap opera on TV, I would argue.  I give you evidence in the following examples: PRETTY CHARACTERS:  A Platinum Blond Angel, a beautiful Striped Angel, gem colored Blue and Sapphire Rams, striped Barbs, flame red … Continue reading Underwater Soap Opera

An Open Valentine to Mr. Grouch

I thought I had already completed my obligatory Valentine’s Day post, when I wrote a love letter to my nasal irrigation system.  But, then I thought there was no reason to disregard my OTHER lovey-dovey.  No need to mention which or whom I love more. Mr. Grouch, you are a man apart, You wake me with your Good Morning fart. We met in the year Nineteen … Continue reading An Open Valentine to Mr. Grouch

I Stalk My Family When They Sleep. And Take Pictures.

My husband and I met on the soccer field – we were on the same intramural team at MSU in 1997.  We talk about this long ago age in “pounds ago”, instead of “years ago” since we were once both young and spry.  Sometimes we still play on coed teams together, or he plays on his own team and I do other things like yoga or jogging (running a half marathon … Continue reading I Stalk My Family When They Sleep. And Take Pictures.

Well, Shit, That Doesn’t Sound Good.

Yesterday morning was a little rough. I never answer my phone when I see a number I don’t recognize.  So, it was not out of the ordinary when I ignored my phone after seeing “Restricted” pop up on my caller id.  I muted the call and went back to sipping my coffee and singing to Baby Grouch in my horrendously off key tones.  Maternity leave … Continue reading Well, Shit, That Doesn’t Sound Good.

Dream #12: Personified Cheesecake

DREAM: Someone neatly slices a wedge out of a beautifully presented, shallow, plain cheesecake.  The Pac-Man shaped, almost whole, cheesecake (Big Cheesecake), and the smaller, pie shaped wedge (Little Cheesecake) are placed, together, in a large bowl of water, where they float on the surface.  Once in the water, it becomes evident that both pieces of cheesecake are alive, and have personalities.  Big Cheesecake moves … Continue reading Dream #12: Personified Cheesecake

Grouchy Pants. Or, Grouchy No-Pants.

I didn’t have any problems sleeping when I was younger.  During elementary school, and even middle school, I generally slept through the night, and had dreams only intermittently.  I didn’t start being all sleep-crazy until I started high school. Thank you, hormones. There was one recurring dream that I can recall from elementary school. I was at the mall, walking down a hallway, by myself.  I hear people shrieking and … Continue reading Grouchy Pants. Or, Grouchy No-Pants.

Heather, The Sleepwalker: A Brief History

If you didn’t read HTS’s intro – check it out here.  Heather slept-walked quite a bit, when she was young.  She says that her family didn’t seem very concerned about it.  Her mom would see her walking around, but since Heather always walked back into her room, her mom knew she was safe, so didn’t see any reason to intervene.    As a teenager, Heather doesn’t recall sleepwalking, I imagine … Continue reading Heather, The Sleepwalker: A Brief History