Oooh, hooray. Kreative Blogger Award. Thank you,
screwed up creative kreativ brain for giving me all of these effed up dreams to blog about.
Laura, at Catharsis, gave me this award (she is just SHOWERING me with love these days, people. I’m starting to get worried that she’s buttering me up, so she can ask me for a big favor one of these days soon…like disposing of random human pinky toes, or holding on to a sealed box that occasionally moves, and emits muffled sounds, and I’ll be obliged to say yes).
But, I wouldn’t just say yes solely because of the awards she bestows. Her blog is witty, relevant and even though it is a “mom blog”, it isn’t one of those that makes you want to stab a fork through your epidermis, and all the way through the muscle, until it pierces you in the uterus, ensuring that it will never be possible for you to turn into that kind of person. Nope. She just seems like a regular person who also happens to have children. I like that, because it gives me hope that someday that will be possible for me, as well. Also, because when I talk to her, or read her posts, I don’t have to suppress the urge to punch her in the teeth. Note: If you are wondering whether or not you may be one of those parents that make others willing to knock out their own choppers, check out the blog, Shut The Fuck Up Parents. It’s hilarious, and it doesn’t knock parents or parenthood, only pokes fun at the overly obnoxious and self-absorbed parental behaviors.
The rules of the award are this: I must reveal seven things about myself and pass it along to ten other deserving bloggers. Sidebar: This blogging requires a lot more revealing than I anticipated. I’m starting to question why I let most of my family members know that I have started one.
1. I loathe when words aren’t spelled correctly. Yes, I do it sometimes, but it drives me insane. SPELL CORRECTLY. USE SPELL CHECK. I know that if I spelled something wrong, it’s because I didn’t edit well enough. “Kreativ”
absolutely sort of makes me itch bugs me even though it is in the form of an award. For shame.
2. I once broke up with a guy, mostly because when we went on a 9 mile hike, he couldn’t keep up (don’t girls usually pack too heavy?) and couldn’t see the paint marks on the trees, and I refused to slow down. I didn’t want to get eaten by a bear. I need my man to be
afraid of getting chewed on by bears as much as I am stronger than that.
3. One of my ex-boyfriend’s got deported. After he cheated on me. More info goes here but family reads this (see above). Imagine the worst things you can. He later tried to friend me on Facebook. Really? What is wrong with people? (In case you are worried, don’t be, my husband is not at all a douche, like 2 or 3.)
4. I once went to my doctor thinking maybe I had ear wax build up (a coworker once told me she couldn’t hear out of one ear, went to the doctor and just had to get her earwax cleaned out, and could hear perfectly, so it made sense to me). But, I had none, and then went in for a hearing test. Turns out I am just so allergic to my cat that it affects my hearing. I also cough and itch at my eyeballs. But, I just take asthma meds, inhalers, prescription eye drops, and tell people to SPEAK UP, because I love my cat too much to get rid of him (NEVER!). Even though he pees on my carpet sometimes.
5. When I was younger, there was a neighbor dog, that wandered all over the place, that I was terrified of. I used to walk around with a baseball bat in my arms, in case it attacked me. I still kind of hate dogs.
7. I have a new job idea. I’m going to pitch it soon. Wish me luck. Also, wish me luck in having a job I can stay in, for more than 3 years. I refuse to do something I don’t love. I’m not sure if I’m being too picky, but…why stick around in one spot if you aren’t sure? Would I change my tune if I made 6 figures? Who knows? I have a large resume.
Enough about me, here are some other fantastic bloggers (in no particular order) that you should absolutely check out!